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By Glenn Baja

Commitment. It’s a word I’ve pondered over a lot since my divorce. For 34 years I was married and in a committed relationship.

Or was I?

But that’s my story. A story to be shared at a later date.

The story today is about you…

Perhaps you’re beamingly proud as friends of mine are who just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary.

Or perhaps you’re sad. Sad for what might of been… what could of been.

If only…

Some will long for days past,

While others will wish they never occurred.

Others will see it as quality time spent,

Others will view it as valuable time lost.

Words

I love looking words up on thesaurus.com. Synonyms help add so much life and feeling. Here’s some of the synonyms for commitment:

ASSURANCE… OBLIGATION

GUARANTEE… NEED… PLEDGE

PROMISE… RESPONSIBILITY… DUTY

and the list goes on.

A friend of mine recently told me that she was struggling with commitment. Fiercely loyal and devoted, she’s experiencing doubt, a result of her spouses alcohol addiction.

Stay or leave? If the answer were that easy the problem would’ve been solved long ago.  

The magic that was once there has diminished. The damage that’s been done cannot be forgotten. It’s happened too many times in the past.

Does one stay out of OBLIGATION? DUTY? PROMISE?

Do you still stand by with ASSURANCE and your GUARANTEE because of a PLEDGE you made long ago?

Is it your RESPONSIBILITY to meet the NEED of another?

Even when the costs are so high? Like your own life spirit?

Your vibrant, alive, and full of energy…

Yet the life is being sucked out of you.

Do you listen to the voices in your head?

Or pay attention to what your heart is saying?

Sacrifice?

Here are some other synonyms:

LIABILITY… MUST… VOW

OUGHT… UNDERTAKING

No wonder this word can be so conflicting… so difficult, bitter, and sweet.

Do you continue to love?

And endure sacrificing your happiness?

Do you choose to live a life “less than”… less than what your heart and soul has gifted and planned for you?

Do you let these last remaining valuable years, months, days, seconds slip by? All because of a COMMITMENT you made many years ago?

Isn’t this the same as choosing unhappiness? Choosing insanity? Doing the same thing over and over again?

Because of a LIABILITY?… a MUST?… a VOW?

An UNDERTAKING that you OUGHT to be doing?

Whose voices are these? Who made these rules up?

Do you go to Hell if you choose to Live… Love… and Risk finding Happiness once again?

Will you be punished by having a black mark against you in the karmic record of life?

Stories? Perhaps.

Real fears? It is for many.

I don’t know.

Isn’t life too short to live in misery or regret? Will you be able to deal with that grief, that heartache, later? Next year? At the end of a life you could’ve lived, but didn’t?

There are people as happy as can be. Others too are celebrating anniversaries, their 40th, 60th, and even 80th. And they thank the All Mighty everyday for the blessings bestowed upon them.

Are they happy? I don’t know. But they appear to be.

But we all know looks can be deceiving.

Fact is, it’s easy to become comfortable with whatever your circumstances are. It’s a law of physics that it’s harder to move something at rest than to bring something in motion to a standstill.

The days are slipping by. Every year seems to go by faster and faster. Time cannot be bought or bargained for.

It’s the here and now that’s important.

You have a choice. You always have a choice.

Choose wisely…

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